Twit Twittering about...and about twittering twit.

In case a few humble readers have notice, I put a twittering widget on the site.  
Over the past few months, I've been so busy I haven't had a chance to blog about the things that have happened (and am working on 3 different posts from December!), so I'd thought I'd cave into the popularity of it and do a little micro-blogging.

At least in this way, you can see what goes on and what might trigger a post.

Additionally, my kiddo has had some interesting insight on some of my dating exploits (the women, not the sex.) so I might include some of our more interesting conversations in.

And for those wondering, I'm down to 110 posts on my google reader.
I'm off to work in this god for saken cold weather.

"There but by the grace of God go I"

The well known utterance by John Bradford, who actually said; ""There but for the grace of God, goes John Bradford."
Anyway.
There has been a number of fellow bloggers who appear that their worlds have been shaken by some personal calamity of some nature, whether its financial, emotional, or marital.  Being keenly aware of what seems to be a chain of drama, I was wondering when it was going to hit someone I knew.
Little did I realize how true my prediction would be, but I didn't think it was going to be ME!
I'm continuously aware of how one's fortune is incredibly tenuous at times. More-so than most people actually believe, really.  It's not merely those that are very poor that can go down a slide, but those of the super rich as well.
Madoff and Stanford are those that decided that the wealthy need a blow to their egos and get ripped off.  The ones that have been on the news after such issues just seem to be in a major state of shock when they find themselves, quite literally penniless overnight.

Whenever I see someone who is less fortunate or going through some trial in life, I always say a small prayer giving thanks, that I am not in their position and strive hard to not to be in the same situation.

Without getting into too much details, I can say I had my own Madoff, but on a VERY smaller scale.
Basically, most of my liquid assets were totally wiped out.
Not to say I'm broke, I still have other savings, but some things need to be pushed back a bit.  Needless to say I was more than a little peeved about the whole thing.
After talking to Starfish, Football Fan, and some other friends about it (and in slightly greater detail) they were amazed on how calm I was.
I wasn't screaming, crying, throwing tantrums, or cursing.
Well, maybe I was cursing a little.
To me, it just simply seemed like a waste of energy and I needed to take stock and form a plan of action.
I took a day off to recover and drown my sorrows in pasta, eventually coming to the realization that I am going to survive, that I can recover from this, that nothing has changed.
I mean, aside from being a little lighter in the pockets and my waistline took a massive hit, there was little or no damage.

My only major concern was some immediate expenses that needed to be looked after and a trip that I am planning.*  

Well, maybe one more concern.

After I hung up the phone in a slight case of depression and a prolonged Texting convo with FF, I asked her the following:

"So does this change things?"
"What does?" she eventually responded.
"My being broke."  She doesn't know the extent of my finances, not that they are THAT extensive.
"Why do you say that?"
"Well, you seemed fairly concerned about it and asked. Remember?" I wondered if she genuinely forgot.
"Did I sound that shallow to you when I asked that question? Really am sorry if I did.  I don't care, I like you for who you are."
"Thanks."
"We will just have cheap dates for a bit.  Maybe more smooching and fewer movies."

That set my mind at ease, she went on to apologize again for a bit longer and eventually told her that I wanted to be alone and sulk.

My time of my pity party is over, though. 
Time to pick myself up and move on and get to work.
Still, it was a perfectly good waste of an excuse to get totally wasted on Vodka, but I can't afford it right now.  I'll make an appointment to be depressed around April, I should be able to afford another good bender by then.



*Yes. I'm still throwing that party, but it's now an act of defiance.  I'll stick to that story.

Ironing the main wrinkles

My distaste for texting a potential girlfriend rises and falls like a wave.  It all depends on the conversation in which it is HOPED that the context isn't overthought out or minimized.

She's walking around behind her kids while they shop around for clothes:

FF: Hey!
Me: HEY!
FF: Working?
Me: No. Just out of shower. I'm squeaky.
FF: Can you make me squeaky?
Me: depends on what you're talking about, but I have made you squeal a few times.
FF: That's what I was meaning.

We go on for a few minutes with some semi-innocent banter for a few minutes and then:

FF: I don't like this. Just frustrated by how much I think of you already.
Me: Oh. Hate it when that happens.  Do you need a break?
FF: DON'T YOU DARE! Don't even think about leaving my brain.
Me: LOL. Ok. I seem to remember you saying you wanted to ate other men so you don't make the same mistake.
FF: I'm trying to find guys to date...not working out yet.
Me:  I hear ya'. Dating can suck.
FF:   I don't think I made mistakes last time.
Me: Oh? I think you alluded to the fact that you picked the wrong guy.*
FF:  No.  I don't think I choose wrong. Made bad decision to go back to him.
Me: That I can understand and appreciate.

With that, she disappeared failing to complete the conversation.
I'm getting used to this, so I just close the phone and then in frustration I yank my cats tail as a means to vent.**



* During our first meeting, she explained that her husband had cheated on her once before.
**Don't worry, she likes that and a good spanking.   No kitties were harmed in the making of this conversation or blog.

No Dating in The dark....

Yeah, I was super busy yesterday and didn't come in until late.
Even though I watched the episode (poor leo and Malik!), I don't think I can do a proper post about it.

Next week I will MAKE time!  It looks pretty damned good!

Additionally, I had to take my AD from CL from one section to another because I got exactly ONE response.

ONE!

Go fig!

Teaser might have been the right name!

Having been ridiculously busy with some things having occurred over the past few months, I was finally able to sit, contact, and concentrate on Teaser for a bit.
Being only able to talk in short spurts with her since we last talked. 
One of the things she was mentioning was how her husband was trying to get into her good graces. 

A little background is in order:
The reasoning behind their separation was due to his cheating and basically kicked him out or she moved out.  Still never got the entire story of it.

Turns out, he has come back begging to be back in her life.  Initially, she had stated that she was quite reluctant to even give him more than a token response, but that had changed over the period of the week or two I haven't been able to have an extended conversation with her.
This week was supposed to be a week for us to get "more familiar" with each other while her kids were visiting her grandparents up north.
The day that they left, I contacted her, but she was fairly distant and didn't react to my overtures.  Comes to find out, she had an eye infection, and considering what she does for a living, it was putting her far behind in her work.  My being the workaholic that I am, I totally understood and gave her some distance so she can catch up to make her deadlines.

Towards the end of the week, we talked a bit more and admitted that she was looking forward to our extended rendezvous, but that she had been talking to her husband and talking about perhaps getting back together.  She was rather torn up about the whole situation and was rather confused about the whole matter on what to do.
Not one to interfere with what makes her happy for my own selfish reasons (I'm not THAT much of a Douche'), I simply wished her luck.

"I'm truly sorry." she went on...
"Apologize for what?" 
" I know you were looking forward to this week and I feel like I have been leading you on, but between the infection and my husband, I feel overwhelmed.  I hope you're shopping around for another woman, because I am very confused as to what do do."
"Not a big deal, you have some serious matters you need to settle."
Then a little surprise.
"You know, we could have a threesome", she added.
I just stared at my phone for a few moments before responding.  I had totally forgot they we swingers.
The next few moments were a bit of a blur and can't quite remember what was said, but it had turned decidedly sexual in nature.
"You know, instead of dealing with him, I'd rather be getting some," She confided.
"That can be arranged if you want." and then I went on how she could simply allow me to come to her house and give her a nice waking up.

Yes. I know, been there and done that before, but DAMN, it's fun!

She didn't promise anything, but said she'd think about it. 

Keeping my phone handy throughout the night, but I have learned not to anticipate much.
As my night drew to a close, I never received the text. 
Pretty much what I expected.

Hair Drama Trauma!

I needed a haircut.
Having been the subject of ridicule from my friends and family (I have been REALLY busy!) about my appearance, but it was a lover that finally got me to do it.

Heading to the Northwest part of town, I casually walk in to the place and I'm greeted by good looking lady and I scan around for my barber....
As if sensing my confusion, she asks if I'm looking for someone.
"Yes, I'm looking for 'H'."
"She sold the place to me."
"What?"
"She got married and moved out of state."
I just looked at her with this even dumber look on my face than usual.
Then again, I had no clue she was even dating anyone!
"Care to wait? I'll be finished with her," Indicated the woman currently in her chair, "in an hour or so."
"This sucks!", I finally said.
"Pardon?"
"This sucks.  Now I don't know where to get my hair cut! But thanks anyway.." and walk outside in a daze.
My barber?  Gone?
This SUCKS!
I mean, really!  I'm more loyal to my barbers than to my girlfriends.
How sad is that?
I've had maybe 4 barbers in my adult life.
One died (and was a lover). two retired, and now another moved to another state?
Immediately sending out a mass text to my friends I asked for a recommendation.
All of them said they could not.
Really? No one?
The pitifulness in my voice was conveyed when I talked to a lady friend.
She's stunned.  She's known me for years and has never heard that "tone" in my voice.
I drive towards home and do a search on my phone for nearby places....
They all seem to be "Salons" as opposed to barber places.
Driving down the Washington Strip, I grab something to eat at a local drive thru taco place. (its much better than it sounds)  Finding a nice shaded place to enjoy my comfort food, I sat there and ate two of them when I glanced down the road and spotted a place just off the main drag.
It's a BARBER!
With the distinctive pole! It's a GUY'S place!
No girly man "salon", but a MAN's place!
I barely finish my last taco when I put my car and drive the two blocks.   Inspecting it from the outside, it had all the characteristics of a guy's place.
I pull into it's small lot and walk inside to find a couple of chairs and a couple of guys sitting around.
The place is not that well kept, with only a few nick knacks around.
Jumping into the chair, I explained my situation to the tall burly "dude" cutting my hair and gave me a heartfelt sympathy.  He understood this was an "interview" haircut.
He asked me how I normally had it.
I responded that I don't remember!
All I had to do in the past was just jump into the chair!
Gently, he explained what he suspects what was done previously
It sounded right...but I told him to give it a shot anyway.  If it's not a good haircut, I was just going to shave it off.
Yes. I'm that militant.
Turns out, it looks pretty good.

I'll just have to see my friends for a unbiased opinion.
That and they can laugh at me for acting like such a freakin' girl.

Now all I have to do is shave the beard.  It's gotten on my nerves.....I might do it tonight. :)



EDIT:   Included pics (thanks starfish!) and I still haven't shaven.  I'm Rockin' the Taliban look!

Cranial Fecal Matter

Blogging (of different genre's) has always been a way for some of us to document our lives, the world around us, to make a difference, or simply be our own cheap therapy session.

Being a Dating blogger (as well a Sex blogger), what we post on here, for the most part, is a snippet of our lives. A snapshot, if you will.  Different snap shots at different times and places.  Very rarely will anyone make the abstract jump as to HOW we get from here to there. 
It's akin to taking a trip starting from one end of the nation to the other, tell you I'm there; but not mentioning the route I took, the foods that were eaten, or the oddities that are seen, witnessed, or done.
In quite a few ways, I feel like I'm cheating you (the eight readers that read this drivel) by not saying what happened in between the stories that I have posted.
While, I'm not proclaiming that my life, in any way, shape, or form is something that I would even consider fascinating,  I am open to comments or questions to both of my blogs as to what happened in between posts. While it may not be fascinating to me, it might fill in an answer for you.

I got that out of the way:

Unless I wish to start an additional blog (under this or another pseudonym) in which I'd talk about other things that interest me. My drivel might start being even more....drivel-ish. Due to my life being in a bit of a hectic, my dating has come to an abrupt stop, but I am still doing the occasional CL for playmates/Girlfriends.
The things I've been considering writing about things that occur to me on a daily basis, or wish to open a dialogue about things. My reading list, is a bit of a clue on my interests, but my life isn't simply contained between my legs (although, to be honest, I would LOVE for someone to be constantly between them), but rather in my mind that is in a frenzy search of answers.

A wide variety of questions always seem to come into my head but with few people to talk about it with and explore.  It's not that I don't' have a close group of friends or even friends with high intelligence, but more like topics that simply doesn't register as having any importance in their lives.  

Questions of "Are you or I considered 'evil' to other people?", "If Hitler got accepted to Art school, what would the world be like?", "What is it like to be in Hawking's or Einstein's brain?", "How in the world did someone have the guts to TRY to eat a ginger root?", and "Do Assholes KNOW they're assholes?"


There is so much in my head, but I realize quite a number of you probably don't care of what goes on inside my head, but hey; It's my blog and if I get this caffeinated again, lord knows what you'd find.


FYI: This post took an hour and a half to write and deleted 90% of it.  Heaven help y'all if I decide to post the echos in my head.

Caught! Enter The Teaser

Having put up a ad on CL a couple of weeks ago, I waited for the responses to trickle in and it didn't take long.

After the intial group was fine, but it wasn't for me and eventually dropped the conversations.

One of my favorites was a woman whose responses were three or four words typed from her blackberry.

After I'd asked her what she was up to for the weekend, her response:

"Probably spend it with kiddos."

Okay.
Being the kind of guy who wants to engage in a conversation, I responded; "Oh? Cool? What are the ages? I'm thinking about heading to a movie and...blah..blah..blah"

Response was simply their ages and it sounded like fun. (!)
I went on and discussed general stuff and the response was always two or three words.
After about a day, I was wondering if she was trying to blow me off, "Are you a woman of few words, or is it just a pain to type on a blackberry?"

"Not short of words just while driving."
"You know, you could always just type when you have time and then hit send."

She laughed, but the pattern continued.
I finally got sick of it after a few more hours and blew her off.

Just because there is an email in your crackberry doesn't mean you have to send a short letter instantly!  I mean, really, when dealing with someone you're pursuing a relationship with, we can handle a little delay between emails if there is a bit of substance to it.

Another of the candidates I have been emailing seemed to get along quite well.  We seemed to have the same general interests and I was fairly optimistic.

During a lull in my day, I started reading an email from her and while the initial tone gave me caution,  she had stumbled across something incriminating.  While I suspected she MIGHT have come across the blog, I wasn't going to confirm or deny anything until I knew WHAT she found.  She strongly hinted that perhaps it was better to just call the whole thing off.
I feigned innocence and asked what she found?  I was fairly certain she didn't find the blog, but probably got me confused with some OTHER idiot.
The next letter contained two links two both of my blogs.   While I was in a store at the time, it was all I could do to giving a visible reaction.   In my mind, I ran around screaming like a little girl and wondering what to do.

Outside, I was the calm cool demeanor that I try to exude....but for a bit there, I thought I wet myself a little bit.

She went on to explain that her ex husband and her both into "The Lifestyle" and didn't think she could go down that road.  After I explained that I was sincere that I am open to changing my ways, she was more than a bit skeptical.
Not that I blame her in the least, but I believe we can.

She continued reading portions of both of my blogs and seems to be coming around.   I have no idea why, but she seems to.  So this should be interesting.

HI HON!

Reading List

These are my current and past reading lists.  The reason I'm making this list is that I hear great books I want to read but I forget to buy them.  I hope to correct this with buying a kindle in the NOT too distant future.  This will give you a slight taste of what I'm like and how my mind might work.
I may be functionally illiterate, but I do like to read when I can.
Feel free to comment or make recommendations in either comments or in email.  Yes, there is a brain behind the penis, but like your typical male, one is slightly bigger than the either.


As of 7/10/09

Currently reading:

"Wired for Warfare" by P.W. Singer


In queue: 

"Future Jihad" by Walid Phares
Supercapitalism by Robert B. Reich
"The Big Switch" By Nicholas Carr
"American On Purpose" by Craig Ferguson

Previous:
"Monster of Florence" by Douglas Preston
"Unwind" by Neal Shusterman
"The Adventure of English" by Melvyn Bragg
"Malcolm X" by Alex Haley
"An Inconvenient Book" by Glenn Beck
The Early books written by "David Eddings"
"Sole Survivor" by Marcus Luttrell

When a cat doesn't cut it.

Several weeks ago, I was taken down for a few days by a nasty little flu.
Swine flu or not, I was miserable and never felt so bad in my life.   It struck so quickly that I didn't budge from the couch where I was at for three days and was only awake for a about 10 hours of them (I think) and this is my VERY hazy realization of how a girlfriend would have been handy and some of the REALLY whacked out dreams I had.

Late on Wednesday night, early Thursday morning, I wasn't feeling very well, and I felt the couch was quite comfortable and decided it was a good place for a nap.
Several hours later, I was freezing with a high fever.
Lovely.
Having the sudden urge to go to the bathroom, my head started spinning and a sneezing fit followed and laid back down
Kitty was sitting on the floor wondering why I hadn't fed her.
"You have bowl full of food. No fancy feast for you today."
Her response was the usual silent staring, so I ignored her and rolled over and promptly went back to sleep.
Some time later, I awoke with her on my chest, staring at me, and meowing loudly.

"I'm dying. Leave me alone."
Once again, the urge to to go the bathroom is there and I slowly get up.  I'm dizzy, my stomach is doing flipflops, my throat felt like it was sandblasted, and incredibly thirsty.

As I'm walking like a zombie with a hangover to the bathroom, the cat is meowing at me and runs into the bathroom.for some water (don't ask).
Looking at the food bowl, it was half full.  The "Fancy Feast" bowl was empty.
Whatever. she can live on purina one for now.
Going back to the couch, I collapse and start groaning and generally whine about my condition wishing for the sweet embrace of death.
While the cat and I are staring at each other, I ask her to go get me some nyquil that I forgot in the bathroom.
"Get me the Fancy feast, and I'll consider it."
"Bitch."
"Back atcha!"
I fade out and once again, the pressure on my chest woke me up.
Well that and her claws which are now applying substantial pressure to my bare chest.
"I'm hungry.  I need food," She said.  For emphasis she stuck her claws a bit deeper into my chest.
Fuck. I should have had her declawed years ago.
"No. Do me a favor and slit my throat with those things."
"Why?  You're warm and I'm comfy.  I just need food."
"You have food, dammit."  I fail in my attempt to dislodge her.  Felt like she weighed a ton.
"It's dry food. I want wet food."
"I'm dying. leave me alone."
"You know, if you had a girlfriend, she could take care of you." she said with some genuine concern in her meows.
"You mean, 'feed you'", I countered.
"Well, there is that," she admitted, "but more to the fact so I wouldn't have to listen to you whine."
"I don't whine!"
"You haven't had to sit here and listen to yourself."
I nod off and woke up sometime at 10pm on friday.
Once again, I make my trip to the bathroom as she rounds the corner from the bedroom and proceeds to meow at me in a nagging way.
"What do you want now?"
"I want food."
Looking over at her bowl, there is substantially less food than there was earlier.
"You shouldn't be hungry.  Your bowl still has quite a bit left."
"But I had to eat that garbage since you passed out."
"I'm sorry, I don't feed you garbage."
"That's a matter of opinion. Also, you need to clean out the box."
"I'll clean it later, but I'll refill your bowl a bit," I said, offering a compromise.
"Fancy feast?", she perked up as I entered the kitchen.
"No, Purina one."
"Damn," with very obvious disappointment, "You still need to clean out my box."
"I'll do it after I recover, you can wait a day or two."
"Can I?  Really?"
I never heard a cat sounding ominous before.
"Yeah, I'm sure."
Making my way back to the couch, I pass out once again.

The Coma was interrupted by a phone call early the next morning;
It was my Idiot friend
"You okay? Haven't heard from you. You sound like hell."
I murmur something that I don't remember.  But I'm sure the word "death" was included in the sentence.
"Need me to bring you something?  We are passing by you in a few hours.", I can hear his wife in the background already packing up medication.
"NO!  Don't want you to catch this crap."  Which is true, they have two small children, including an infant. 
Hearing the phone wrestling away from him, the wife's voice comes on;
"Hey, we can leave it on your doorstep if you want.   Where's your girlfriend?"
"Long story, she isn't in the picture."
"Sorry to hear that.  Life would be easier right now if you had one around."
"Thanks. The cat mentioned that too."
"What?  Are you smoking as well?  I didn't think you touched the stuff."
"Long story. Go take care of the kids, and slap your husband for me."
"Okay.  Hope you feel better. BYE!"
Me and IF talk for a minute more before I tell them I need to go die for awhile and pass out once again.
After being awakened by some annoying meowing, I start heading towards the bathroom and spot kitty waiting for me.
Sitting on the edge of the bathtub, she had that smug look that I am always suspicious of, so I peered into the tub.
Kitty poo.
"I told you there would be consequences."
"Fuck off, cat," as I reached to clean up the mess.
"There is more of that later if you want," she said in that menacing little voice of hers.
"No more snacks for you," I told her.
"Feh.  You haven't given me snacks in weeks.  It's an empty threat."
Yes it was.  Damn.
I stomp back towards the couch, my fever at an all time high.
"You DESERVE the swine flu!"
Thinking back at the symptoms from the news, I was in the clear, but I need to make sure, so I power up the laptop and look it up:
Fever. Check. cough. Check. Sore throat. Yep. Runny nose. Check. Headache. Massive. Muscle soreness. Definitely.
" ...about 38% of patients had vomiting or diarrhea." Nope. Totally in the clear.
I power down and start watching what was recorded on my TiVo, get more water, get some leftover pizza, and settle down.  I hadn't eaten in almost 2 days, and was starving.
Kitty teleported to my side.
"Food", was her only statement.
"Go to hell. Let me suffer in peace" and I push her off the couch.
She huffs away.
I'm after a couple of semi dazed hours of TV viewing, I'm in a catatonic (no pun intended) state, staring blankly at my "Playlist".
That's when I realized the other two symptoms showed their ugly heads.
Kitty was there to egg me on.
"You know, if you had a girlfriend, she'd help you with this."
The words "shut up" almost came out of my mouth, but it was rather busy at the time.

"You know, she would have made sure I was fed, changed my litter box, gave me fresh water, and-"
"HELLO! I'm the one that's SICK! I haven't really eaten, drank, or even bathed in three days!"

"You didn't have to point out the last one, that is obvious," she said with more than a little disgust in her tone.
Again, I decided it was best to pass out and ignore my cat.
She does have a point, though.

By the beginning of the fourth day, I was actually able to hold down food and take hour long HOT showers.  It felt great to be (relatively) Human again. 
The recollections of those conversations was just plain surreal, but as I retold the story to friends, and their knowing my cat; they found the whole thing quite believable.

Particularly that I need a girlfriend.

Dinner with a Latin Flavor

"We still on?", I sent in a text.

"YES!", was the reply.
I pulled into traffic and was on my way during heavy traffic to make it past the Galleria area by 7pm.
The phone rang with her name;
"Yes?"
"Hey! Can you pick me up? My sister has to use my truck."
"Huh?"

I absorb the situation and agree that its probably the best option.
Having pulled up to her complex, I am greeted by her and her sister, who immediately takes down my name and license plate information.
WTF?
Since I picked her up, the original location of our dinner wasn't sounding as appetizing.
I take in my surroundings and realize there is a half decent restaurant right in front of us.   Parking the car, we go in and eventually get our order and start our conversation.

As she begins, I take in her features; Slightly heavy, with smiling eyes, tan (naturally) skin, with a slightly suggestive blouse.
She goes on about reverse racism and how she is considered the ultra-conservative of her family; She has a hate (that I share) for the local LULAC president/Clan Director, or whatever.


During the course of the conversation, I tested the waters as far as her sexually being open.
Swinging wasn't even remotely appealing, nor were threesomes.
I didn't dare to bring up any of the other things.

The dinner and conversation went well, no red flags came up, but the date overall was.....blah.


I'm hoping for another date in the near future, though to see if there is a spark.

The Smooch

KM and I were talking (okay, Texting), about what she liked in a sensual/sexual relationship.

"Deep long kisses."
"But I have yet to kiss you that way, just smooches."
"I LOVE your little smooches."

The conversation moved on to other things, but it got me thinking.about smooches.

Kissing has been in film since almost the begining of film, poetry, song, and idealized by many adolescent girls.

Me? I prefer smooching.  While the movie "The Kiss" is actually a smooch, while it is extremely tame by today's standards, I find it very erotic.
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy the deep sensual kisses that you could remember for days, but you have to have the right circumstances. To properly plant a good kiss needs the right timing and space needed.
Smooching, on the other hand, can be planted anytime and anywhere, as needed.  It can be given in front of other people without that uncomfortable pause/look from them.  It's a low dose of PDA that won't offend anyone. 
Well, maybe not EVERYONE.
It can be a very subtle reminder that you care for that person, so a drive by smooching is perfectly acceptable. As busy as my schedule is, sometimes that's all you get as I fly out the door, additionally, I've also found that time seems to move a bit slower, allowing to appreciate that person a bit more. A quarter of a second seems to stretch out to a full minute when you look at her in the eyes of your target and you see their eyes change as you get in closer.
I have two favorite targets;  the neck and the lips.
Ears are okay, but only when you have a full make out session going. accidental slobber on the ears can be bad, particularly if you're going back out in public.


Smooching isn't for everyone, but it certainly can be a great deal of fun in just about any circumstance and is a great reminder of that you're simply thinking of them.

Okay, so I have these overly romantic feelings sometimes, I'm not gay, I just happen to like romantic comedies.

I need a job

Well, not really.

After a few initial responses to my ad, it seems like a number of them were turned off by my job.
It's not a sexy job, nor is it a low paying job, but I guess it's not the typical 9 to 5 job that ladies want a man to have.
So far the only ones that haven't shied away from it are KM and Lumens.
What I've been thinking of doing is telling them outright what job I have or make up a job that is REALLY bad that will see if that will dissuade them in some way.

A couple of suggestions friends have made is:

Dog Catcher
Road Kill Cleanup.
Crime Scene Cleanup
Slaughter House Dude
Tax Collector.

Yes, this all sounds lame, but then again, so are the ladies who stop writing/calling after I tell them what I do for a living.

I'm totally open to suggestions.

What? What? NO!

MINUTES after I posted my last entry, while I am reaching for my fourth glass of wine, the phone buzzes and scared the shit out of me.
KM's picture is grinning at me as the phone cheerfully announces that she is on the other side.
Taking a deep breath, I muster total calm.  Complete calm.  Inhale.
Breathe.

"Hi, Sweetie!"
"Are you mad at me?"  Did my tone give it away?
"Well, I AM a bit peeved." Fuck it. Gotta be honest.
"Why?" WHY?  She asks WHY??
"Because you left me hanging, I didn't know what was going on." Again. Be honest.
Okay, everything is on the table.
Let's roll the dice.
"Well, I was busy with the kids and..." She continued for several minutes...Until I finally had to interrupt.
"Look, I understand SIX kids can be a handful. I get it, I just wished you could have simply told me what was going on."
"I know. I suck.  I'm really bad about that."
"That's all I ask.  Keep me informed."
"I know, I suck at that."  If she knows that, why can't she correct it?
"So, where at you at now?"
"Home."
"Oh, I guess you wouldn't want to hang out with me, being irritated and all."
"No. Not irritated. Peeved.  Difference."
"Oh?"  C'mon!  I don't wanna' parse words!
"Yes. Peeved."
"Well, if you're peeved at me, you probably wouldn't want to be with me tonight."
What?  What? No! I'll be with you tonight!  Really!
"Whatever you wish to do, doll.  I am at your service."
"Well, let me take care of things here and I'll let you know."  FUCK! WOMAN! Make a decision!!, "Besides, I'm not showered, I've been up all day..." 
My hopes for tonight are being squashed by a ton of excuses.
"You DO know they have showers in hotels, if that is what you want to do."  Okay. that came out snarky, but, whatever.
"I know, I...well, I don't know what to do tonight." You want to be with me!  I'll hold your hand! I'll massage your feet!  I just want to spend time with you!
"Well, whatever you feel comfortable with, I'm okay." Total lie.  I'll sulk like a kid if I don't see her.
"Okay, well, I'll call you back."


ARGH!
Oh good lord!
As I'm opening up my 2nd bottle, I hear my phone buzz and I'm immediately tempted to throw it down the garbage disposal.
I read the text message and I almost lose it:

"Let's skip tonight. I am really not good company."

My reaction is a bit more childish I've thought I'd be.  I throw every pillow and cushion within reach.
After a couple of minutes, I sit on my now, VERY uncomfortable couch with my cat begging to be scratched.

So much for having a little Pussy and now I'm incredibly drunk.

Sunday, make it or break it?

You know, I'm am entirely too nervous for this.  This is a DATE, an actual date!
Ever since I've gone on my little quest, I've been startled on how difficult it is.  I mean, C'MON!  What woman wouldn't WANT a guy that  wants to (potentially) put aside a a lifestyle he's known for years.

As KM so gently put it, I AM pervert.  To ask exposing one of my favorite sayings, "I have more kinks than a cheap gold chain."

But I want to DATE this girl, I LIKE this girl, six kids?  No biggie, I've been a father before, it's easy to hide bodies.
I AM kidding.  Really.
Okay, so we have had a few bumps in the road, a few twists, and some misunderstandings, but since our last talk, I feel confident that we can go ahead and start dating.  I mean, get I HOPE she's into me, but women have a mind of their own, so only time will tell.

So right now, sitting on my couch, I am sweating like the male chauvinistic pig people think I am, freshly shaven, putting on a nice shirt and pants.  I am SCARED out of my mind. Looking at it objectively, its funny as hell.
I KNOW we're going to a hotel, I KNOW we're going to have sex.  So why am I am rambling on a blog that maybe three people read once a week, that I'm nervous as shit?
I mean, C'mon! I've had some doozy encounters with people I haven't met before in which I didn't really have to do much to get laid, but I don't think people at NASA put this much thought into their shuttle as I am putting on this "date".
In fact, can it be considered a date, or is it an "extended booty" call.

Fuck!  I feel like such a girl about this shit.

Tuesday Mixups and talks. C'mon Sunday!

Having been worried with the potential of having Lumens with me on a date (an extended sexual romp, actually, but whatever.), I decided to put off meeting with her and just deal with KM, since the chemistry is so there for us.  Besides, Lumens and I can virtually meet whenever, and I consider time with KM a bit more of a rare commodity.
Ten minutes after I hung up the phone with Lumens, KM called, figuring she'd tell me what time she wanted to meet tonight:
"Hey!"  Uh-oh.  It's THAT tone.
"Hey sweetie, wassup?"
"The shipment is really screwed up.  Can't make tonight. I'm sorry."  I can hear commotion in the background of people running around.
"Don't worry about it."  Was all I could muster, but I knew work had a tendency to be hellish at times.
"How about Sunday night at 6?  I am totally yours, you can use me as you will." She said between telling people what to do and asking another question of someone.
"How can I resist such an offer.  Deal.  I'll even take you on a date and see a movie."
"A Date? What's that?   I would LOVE a movie."  Listen, I have to go, you're not mad at me, are you?"
"Nah." As long as we have a firm schedule in place.  We're cool.
As long as she KEPT it, that is.
"Great! Just have to drop off the kids and my body is yours."  I heard a massive crash of something hitting the floor, "Gotta go! Bye!" and immediately hung up.

Well, my plans for today is totally shot.
Business was exceedingly slow to the point I was playing with a game on my G1 for a couple of hours.

10pm passes by when my phone rings:
"Hey baby, just got home, I was able to finish early, and about to hit bed."
"Aw, poor baby, if I would have known you left early, I would have taken you to late snack."
"I AM starving.....maybe meet for a few minutes? IHOP?"
"Sure!"  We needed to have "The Talk" we never got around to.
At 11:08pm, I got the "On my way", TXT."
We arrived within minutes of each other and as we sat down, my heart started racing.
Yes.  I REALLY missed her and was anxious to have some face time with her.
Having held hands for a moment, she realized she needed start "The Talk."
"First off, you're a pervert."  She begins.
"Yes I am." was my deadpan response.
"I don't know if I can handle that."
"Handle what?" Was curious, of course.
"You like quite a few things."
"Yes I do."  If she only knew.
"I don't think you'd be satisfied with JUST ME."
"Well, if things go well with us, you won't have to worry about that."  I truly meant it.
Basically, she was saying that she wasn't sure she would be interested in multiple sex partners, Adult Bookstores, etc.

See, I left out quite a bit during our little romp, including talking about going to an adult bookstore (which SHE suggested!) to have sex (since she didn't want to be seen as a "Ho'" to her roomie), but she was barefoot, so I nixed that idea.  Or, talking VERY dirty to her in the middle of fingering her ass during an intense orgasm which included, wondering if she wanted another cock to play with (which she was VERY open to), or my doing a "break in" one night.  Nor did I mention her walking out of the house nude, except for my trench coat and going to a nearby grocery store because she neede cream.
Yes, make your own jokes.
According to her now, she can barely recall getting in my car, but has vague memories of being VERY turned on by the experience.
I confirmed this by our makout session in the car afterwards that I reminded her about.  Her face turned VERY red at that point.


To reassure her, I told her that I would go at her pace on whatever she wanted to do WHEN she wanted to do it.  She would dictate what/who would be in bed with us.

Did I mention I could be VERY pursuasive? No?  I can be.

We also talked about communications, or lack of it.
I gave some examples of what I expected.   Don't need an immediate response to every text, but merely an acknowledgement of it...eventually.
She mentioned that since she's with her kids, things can be crazy.  I assured her that I knew how kids can teleport if you don't pay attention to them.
"Yeah, three of them are great about that, but the three older ones are generally good about keeping an eye on them when I have all of them."
I stopped mid-chew.
"I thought you had five?"
"No. Six."
"Where'd I get five?"
"Don't know, because I woudn't say five."
Okay. She has six kids.  Did I mention she looks AWESOME for the number of kids she has had? No.  Tkae my word for it.
"See? That's a good example!"
"I see your point."

We discussed quite a few things, and again, we resolved some other issues, our waitress got an earful of good gossip.

We both got up and left hand in hand towards her car, stealing kisses all along the way.  She didn't want to leave, nor did I WANT her to leave, so we sat there trading little kisses, bites to the neck, making suggestive remarks, and playing with her VERY satiny and elastic pants like she wore several weeks ago. The suggestion of  our going to my car to recreate things almost left my lips, but she had a long day ahead of her and she needed her sleep.
Leaving seconds behind her and kept her in my view until she took her exit and I continued on.

I was missing her already, but was more optimistic in our dating potential and there is always sunday. :)

How'd I get here?

I have been reading blogs off and on for several years, before they got big on the news.
A friend of mine asked why *I* didn't start a blog and my response to him was that no one would believe the crap I would write, much less understand it.
I didn't think I'm much of a writer, and looking back at some of the drivel I have written, I was right!
Eventually I did start a blog about my hobby, and I was fairly content.  But I had let it wallow for quite some time as I took a break to concentrate on life.
But the call for wild sex compelled me to start again and my friends were glad to see me "back at it".
My personal wake up call was when at, part after party, I would leave at the end of the evening alone.

Since then, I've met a number of women, who are going to get their own posts, just so I can keep track of it.   Not entirely sure how if I should have one for each blog, or put them in a single post and on which blog.

Ugh. Can't ANYTHING be straightforward?

The Funk and the Fuck....

Having thought about my last post for a few hours, I was thinking of deleting it and dismissing it as my having a childish outburst, but before I hit the delete button and realized that it was something real I was feeling that brought me to this moment.
While it isn't rational and it WAS a bit childish, it was something that I was feeling, good or bad. I felt particularly so after reading Aurore's post that affected her. While THIS blog is totally different from hers, the fact is that life isn't always edited to show perfection. It's ugly, raw, and hurtful, but like OEN's Blog, there can be a mixture of Silliness, irony, and mayhem if you just look for it.

To be honest, after the last post, I went on a bit of a funk and gave myself the day off to gather my thoughts and see what I want to do.

As usual, odd things have an odd sense of timing. My phone rang and it was Stormcloud, who is an ex girlfriend that I remained friends with. She always seemed to have the worst luck in the world financially, jobs, and life in general. I kept our friendship because I seemed like I was the only consistent thing in her life. Usually she only called me when she needed a shoulder to cry on. This time however, she wanted my company in a physical sense.
When I got there a couple of hours later, we chatted like we always did. Without any preliminaries, we simply walked into the bedroom and started getting dressed.
While I don't consider that we Made Love, I think we simply needed each other and we were good with that.

No, I won't get into the nitty gritty about that, this is NOT that kind of blog.
After sex, we laid next to each other watching TV while she dozed.
Unfortunately, I had to leave since she was on a different sleeping schedule than I was.
She understood this and walked me to the door.
Having kissed me goodbye, she closed the door and locked it as I headed towards my car in this small suburban town.
It was a long drive home, but I felt much better compared to a few hours ago.

ANOTHER single blog? Please

Yeah, its a singles blog. We'll see how long that lasts.

I know it's a bit contradictory to my other blog's sexual thing, but everyone needs a companion.
Over the past several months, I've been going on some horrific dates. They all like me, I just don't see them matching what I am and my "hobby."

But I had plenty of material to share. Some of the women are bizarre and the dates were some were just plain scary.


Like with my other blog, no names will be used and I will be speaking in generalities so as to not "contaminate" each other and my dating pool.

Now if you're wondering about that, quite simply, women that I date won't know about this blog. Some of them might be bright enough to see that I have ANOTHER blog and that would be an "oops." This could suck, particularly if I am actually interested in a lady.

Simply don't want to scare them off THAT easily.

The single ladies that I meet won't really "see" that side of me, and believe it or not, I plan on being quite chaste with them, until I see where they stand on such sexual matters.

Yes, I believe in total chemistry, feelings, blah, blah, blah, but I also want to be able for her to either be accepting or into some of the things I'm into. But also, if I'm into the person enough, I might change my lifestyle altogether.

It's a weird post, I know, but I'm a weird person.